During my pregnancy, and then Jr's first nine months I lost track of my "plan" with Rose. I used to always have goals and go about achieving them. Then I just got too big, hormonal, and sleep deprived, and at some point just stopped focusing on Rose. My family says that this means I'm a good mom, focusing on Jr. more than my horse. Okay, yes, I guess that does. I'm glad that makes them happy. However, the same phrase tells me I'm a bad horse owner.
It's such a fine balance to between one's love of horses and love of family. Clearly I'm not going to put my horse above the well being of my child, but I can't neglect her either. During Jr's first nine months, I "tried" to get to the barn as much as possible. Some weeks that meant I would only get out there once, if at all. Quite often I would wonder why I should even bother riding her, since it wouldn't make any difference to ride her just once a week. I would still ride though. When I decided to put her up for sale I knew that she had to get back into shape and into serious work to sell, so into full training she went. Once her month of full training ended, I forced myself to get to the barn at least four days a week, in addition to EB riding her two days a week, she is now in consistent work again. Finding the time to ride hasn't easy, but then Jr. started sleeping through the night a few weeks ago, and life in general has gotten better. I also decided to start really focusing on Rose's ground work again too.
Somewhere during this process, I started making goals again and really enjoying working with my horse. It occurred to me, that I should always work with Rose like I am trying to sell her. She loves it, I love working with her and accomplishing new things, and everyone is happier. Well except Hubs, who has to be on baby duty for three hours, four days a week. Me? I get a blissful three hour break in my non-stop 24hr parenting routine where I get to focus on only one thing...my horse. Now if only the guilt I feel about taking up so much of Hub's time to go ride my pony would just subside. That would be great. Darn you Catholic guilt...go away you pesky guilt you.
Happy trails and swooshing tails!